How To Make
Her Feel Like She's Chasing You
I’ve been going out with this woman for 3
months now. She told me she wants what she
can’t have, and she loves to chase... and
that she has very much caught me already.
She asked me to make her chase me more. I
find this quite hard to do seeing as I
already have her and she knows in the end
she will still have me. I hope that makes
sense. Is there anything I could do to make
her feel like she is chasing me?
Does it make sense to chase someone you’ve
already caught or who has already caught
you? Yes, absolutely.
Before I can go into what you can do to make
her feel like she’s chasing you, I’d like to
clarify a little bit what she means by “she
wants you to make her chase you".
Remember the first few weeks when you met
her and there was that excitement -- when
the two of you knew that there was some
level of attraction there but there was a
little bit of mystery because you didn’t
know the other person so well, there were
moments of suspense when you were waiting to
see if the other would call and receiving a
phone call or email or msn made the day.
Everything felt new, fresh and exciting,
well, what she’s saying to you is that she
doesn’t feel that “new, fresh and exciting"
She is saying she wants to feel the
stimulation that comes with expecting
(because she doesn’t know what you’ll say or
do next), being surprised (by something she
didn’t know you had in you) and swept off
her feet (by a rare man who is also a rare
catch). That is the “thrill of the chase".
That’s what she loves, and that what she
wants from you.
She wants that because your relationship
seems to have settled into predictable, same
old same old, boring. She feels that she’s
“caught you already" because it seems that
all she has to say is jump and you say how
high. There’s nothing that is a bigger
turnoff for both men and women than someone
who is too eager to please and then goes
ahead to do the same predictable things --
same questions, same conversations, same
dates -- over and over. No suspense, no
surprises, no thrill moments and nothing is
ever challenging or is new and exciting.
To make her feel like she’s chasing you, you
have to give her the challenge and
satisfaction of having done something new
and different, and accomplished something
Now there all kinds of advice out there on
how to give a woman (or man) a challenge and
get a reaction from her, and this includes
making her jealous, not picking up the phone
or answering any emails, always saying
you’re busy, ignoring her and stuff. Yes,
you will get a reaction from her doing all
these things. If the reaction is ever a
positive one (mostly it’s negative), it’ll
only be very temporal because you cannot
sustain a relationship not answering phones
or emails, ignoring someone, being too busy
that you have no time for them or constantly
trying to make them jealous. No relationship
will EVER survive with such tactics.
To be able to create truly exciting,
meaningful and fulfilling relationship you
have to spend time together, show the other
that you understand, accept and truly care
about them and would be happy with just him
or her, and no others. These are the things
that create STABILITY -- that feeling of
“you will always have me". But stability
alone is not enough. It’s like having a
really reliable car with no fuel to run it.
You need the fuel -- that something that
gives her the sense that things are "on the
move" -- fresh, exciting and going
What you need to start doing to make her
feel like she’s doing something new and
different and accomplishing something
worthwhile by being with you. This is the
principle on which Playing Hard-To-Get (at
least the way I teach it) is built upon. If
that combination of “accomplishment" is not
there, the passion and feeling of “new,
fresh and exciting" begins to die off.
1. Create challenges -- The challenge needs
to be rewarding and satisfying to the person
(appeal to the mind, emotions and body in
equal proportion, and if possible at the
same time), otherwise it’s just too much
hard work for little or no reaction. If it
doesn't feel like a challenge to her, you
may even get a negative reaction (annoyance,
dislike or spitefulness).
2. Throw in thoughtful surprises -- say and
do things that say you’re a lot more fun to
be around and she doesn’t know what she’s
missing when she’s not with you. Just when
she thinks she’s had you figured out, do
something (which is wildly uniquely you)
that will leave her literally awestruck and
wanting more of where that came from.
3. Keep her always anticipating -- This is
very different from being secretive,
detached, inaccessible, unconcerned,
indifferent, stubborn, aloof and sometimes
downright cruel -- all the things that make
the other person very suspicious and unsure
about you and the relationship. Keep her
(him) anticipating is keeping her (or him)
looking forward to something new or
different especially when she has no idea it
was coming. Any simple thing can be
stretched until she is literally begging you
to tell or show her what it is because she
can't take it anymore.
These are just three things you can do.
There a lot many other things you can do to
make her make her feel she is chasing you
even though both of you know that you
basically “have’ each other already. I can
not list them all here because then I have
to copy and paste 150 pages of my e-Book.
It’s in these moments of Playing Hard-To-Get
(chasing and catching) in a loving and
affectionate way that you take the
relationship deeper into the mystery and
magnificence of love itself. This is why
Playing Hard-To Get is called "The Game of
When it comes to “Playing Hard-To-Get" LOVE
itself is the Guru and Master of this game.
Love is mysterious, exciting, challenging,
satisfying and can be hard (but not
impossible) to get. And when you do catch
it, you don't want to let it go. But when
you stop fueling it, it slowly but surely
slips out of your hands.
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